


Loosely/Lightly

by Abigail (artyandabby)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cross-Posted on Tumblr, F/M, Grey-Asexual/Grey-Romantic Jo, for acespnweek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-09
Updated: 2014-09-09
Packaged: 2018-02-16 18:55:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2280924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artyandabby/pseuds/Abigail
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It took Jo a long time to understand herself. So long, in fact, that she's dead before she knows it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Loosely/Lightly

The first time, Dean turned her down without waiting for her to ask. She wasn't sure she would have. A part of her was glad he hadn't asked, and that she hadn't tried.  
Jo could still remember standing there in the bar, surrounded by the smells of lacquered wood and beer, with this beautiful boy who doubted her music taste. She remembered being so confused. She could note a bunch of tiny features that would have been front and center in any pulp novel(muscles in his arms, wider than his brother's, clean, bright eyes, freckles like constellations), but nothing happened. A flutter in her stomach would've been nice.  
The second time, they were hunting and she scrutinized the short hair at the back of his neck every time he turned, trying to figure out what her muddled thoughts were saying. She realized better when they were close in the bowels of the building, and she couldn't decide if she wanted to run or get closer.  
Jo didn't see him for a long time after that, and she was fine with it. It was easier. She settled into a rhythm, romantically. She went on outing that mostly tried to turn into dates. Sometimes...other things. Most failed right about the time tongues were introduced into the equation. She developed a few surefire ways of dismissing the drifters who wandered into the bars. Some would shut up if they had their lips around a bottleneck, others talked more. On bad days she asked Ash or her mother to sling drinks and let her do something else.  
And then she was dead.  
Her last sensation was pain, but as she leaned on her mother's shoulder, she tried to push her mind to back before that. Dean's hands on her shoulders. A kiss, neat and quick, on her forehead. That was okay. That was nice. She hadn't known that before. She tried to think of the roadhouse, and her mother, and Ash, but the world was slipping away, and all she heard was growling....  
And then she was back.  
Sensation returned in a jolt, then drew away. It was like she was halfway there. Halfway dead, halfway alive, and all the way staring at a pair of brothers suddenly in front of her.  
The looks on their faces sent shockwaves through her.  
She didn't want to say goodbye. She didn't want to go back to being dead. She wanted to see Ash, and her mom, and the boys, and that oddball angel...  
Still, her fading could have been worse.  
Jo touched Dean's face gently, like he had who knew how long ago. She didn't have long; she knew that. She didn't mind it then. She didn't need long to do this.  
Jo leaned forward and kissed him lightly. A ghost of a kiss, even. She smiled at the thought.  
Lightness was the key. Light...it was around her. She didn't need to kiss Dean again.  
Jo Harvelle departed, this time knowing what she wanted.


End file.
